| Everyone dreams of a life full of love and adventure. | | | | focuses your attention completely, so you cease being |
| But we fill ourselves with reasons not to follow our | | | | aware of yourself as separate from your activity. You |
| dreams. Instead of protecting us, they imprison and | | | | become one with it; you act spontaneously. |
| hold us back. Life will be over before we know it, so | | | | * Sense of Control. Developing your skills so you can |
| now is the time to really live life and love. | | | | reduce the margin of error as close to zero as |
| In Life Lessons, Elizabeth Kübler-Ross and David | | | | possible and being able to influence a doubtful |
| Kessler suggest that love is the only gift in life that is | | | | outcome produces a sense of exercising control in |
| not lost and is ultimately the only thing we can really | | | | difficult situations. |
| give. Start by loving yourself. | | | | * Self Concern Disappears. Protecting our ego, the |
| 1. Love Yourself. To give love, you must have love. | | | | image we hold of ourselves as separate from |
| Too often we put conditions on love. Conditions on | | | | everything else, requires mental energy. Enjoyable |
| love weigh it down and keep us from loving | | | | activities with clear goals, stable rules and challenges |
| completely. | | | | well matched to our skills present no threat to our |
| * Be Compassionate With Yourself. Don't judge, | | | | egos. Immersion in such activity strengthens our sense |
| criticize or beat yourself up when you make a mistake. | | | | of being capable. |
| Cut yourself some slack. | | | | * Altered Sense of Time. Immersion in challenging |
| * Nurture Your Soul. Do things that make you feel | | | | activity causes how we perceive time to speed up |
| good about yourself and make you truly glad you did | | | | (we look up and 8 hours have passed without noticing) |
| them. Let the love in that's all around. Schedule and | | | | or slow down (like a batter watching a pitch in slow |
| budget for these nurturing activities; pick something that | | | | motion). Complete involvement frees us from the |
| will make you feel great and do it! | | | | tyranny of time and deepens enjoyment. |
| * Remove Barriers. Let go of conditions you place on | | | | Pick an activity that has these traits and you'll love |
| giving and receiving love. Give love freely with no | | | | what you do. |
| thought of receiving love in return. Receive love with | | | | 3. Love in Service to Others. In A Simpler Way, |
| no conditions or self-criticism. Remember the Beatles | | | | Margaret Wheatley and Myron Kellner-Rogers |
| song lyric from The End, "... And in the end, the love | | | | suggest that any self-expression that is not meaningful |
| you take is equal to the love you make." | | | | to others is irrelevant and won't survive in a |
| 2. Love What You Do. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, in Flow, | | | | systems-seeking world. So expressing what you love |
| the Psychology of Optimal Experience, identifies eight | | | | in service to others is your task. |
| major components of enjoying an activity. His studies | | | | * Do What You Love. Identify anything that meets |
| on flow suggest an activity is enjoyable when at least | | | | some or all of the eight criteria listed above for loving |
| one and often all eight components are present. | | | | what you do. What would you do if money were not |
| * Completion. We need tasks with sufficient | | | | an object? Let your list simmer on the back burner of |
| complexity to challenge and stretch us to develop our | | | | your subconscious. |
| skills but that won't overwhelm us. | | | | * Combine Activities You Love. List without judging the |
| * Concentration. The root of concentrate means to | | | | things you love to do and how you might combine |
| "center". We need tasks that allow us to wrap our | | | | them. If you love writing, travel and spirituality, you might |
| mind around it and be challenged by it. Tasks that are | | | | consider traveling to spiritual sites and writing a travel |
| too hard will overwhelm us; tasks that are too easy will | | | | guide on how to get there and what to do once you're |
| bore us. | | | | there. Or consider organizing, marketing and guiding |
| * Clear Goals. Stephen Covey tells us to begin with the | | | | travel tours there. Be creative; use your imagination! |
| end in mind, to know what we'd like to accomplish. A | | | | * Serve Others. As you imagine possible |
| clear goal gives us a specific outcome that our mind | | | | manifestations of the activities you love, guide your |
| can use to discern if we are meeting the test. | | | | imagination to ways that serve others. Remember, if |
| * Feedback. Feedback allows you to compare your | | | | you're going to make a living by doing what you love, |
| outcome to your goal. It's a symbolic message that | | | | you'll need others to pay you! Make your offering |
| allows you to create order in your consciousness and | | | | something others want or need! |
| shift your efforts if your outcome is off course. | | | | Love and treat yourself well, learn what you love to do |
| * Deep, Effortless Involvement. Attending fully to what | | | | and do what you love in a ways that serves the |
| is happening in the present prevents our mind from | | | | needs of others! You'll be glad you did! |
| filling with extraneous worries, thoughts and distractions. | | | | Copyright 2005, Fruition Coaching. All rights reserved. |
| Applying all your relevant skills to meeting challenges | | | | |